Quick answer
Al-Anon is a free support group for people affected by someone else's drinking, such as spouses, parents, adult children and friends. Alateen is its program for teens. Other options include Nar-Anon and Families Anonymous for drug use, Adult Children of Alcoholics, SMART Recovery Family & Friends, and therapist-led CRAFT. Most offer in-person and online meetings.
Loving someone who drinks too much or uses drugs is exhausting, and it’s easy to feel like you’re the only one. You aren’t. Millions of families deal with this, and there are free groups built for exactly this situation.
What is Al-Anon?
Al-Anon Family Groups is a worldwide fellowship for people whose lives have been affected by someone else’s drinking. It began in 1951, founded by family members of early Alcoholics Anonymous members. Al-Anon is:
- Free. There are no dues or fees, though groups may pass a basket for voluntary donations.
- Focused on you, not the drinker. Meetings help you cope, recover your own peace of mind and stop trying to control the other person’s drinking.
- Based on the Twelve Steps, adapted from AA. It’s spiritual but not tied to any religion.
- Anonymous. What’s said in meetings stays there.
Your loved one doesn’t have to be in recovery, or even admit there’s a problem, for you to go.
What is the difference between AA and Al-Anon?
AA is for people who want to stop drinking. Al-Anon is for the people around them. The two are separate fellowships, although they share the Twelve Steps and many meetings are held in the same buildings.
What happens at an Al-Anon meeting?
A typical meeting lasts about an hour. A volunteer chairperson opens with a reading, there may be a topic such as detachment or acceptance, and members take turns sharing their experience. You can just listen. Nobody will ask you to speak, and there’s no cross-talk or advice-giving. Newcomers are often given free literature and phone numbers of members who are happy to talk between meetings.
Many groups suggest trying at least six different meetings before deciding whether Al-Anon is right for you, because each group has its own feel.
How do I find an Al-Anon meeting?
- Search the meeting finder at al-anon.org for in-person, phone and online meetings.
- Call Al-Anon’s U.S. and Canada meeting line at 1-888-425-2666 (1-888-4AL-ANON).
- Download the free Al-Anon Family Groups app to find meetings and read daily literature.
What is Alateen?
Alateen is part of Al-Anon and is for young people, usually ages 13 to 18, who are affected by a parent’s, sibling’s or friend’s drinking. Meetings are sponsored by adult Al-Anon members who meet safety requirements. Alateen helps teens understand that the drinking isn’t their fault and connects them with peers who get it.
What other support groups are there for families?
Al-Anon is the best known, but it isn’t the only choice. If it doesn’t feel like a fit, try one of these:
- Nar-Anon Family Groups. A Twelve Step program like Al-Anon, but for families and friends of people who use drugs.
- Families Anonymous. A Twelve Step group for relatives and friends concerned about a loved one’s drug, alcohol or behavior problems. Many members are parents.
- Adult Children of Alcoholics & Dysfunctional Families (ACA). For adults who grew up in homes affected by drinking or other dysfunction and still feel its effects.
- SMART Recovery Family & Friends. A non-Twelve-Step, science-based option. It teaches communication and coping tools drawn from CRAFT and cognitive behavioral therapy.
- CRAFT with a therapist. Community Reinforcement and Family Training is a structured approach that teaches families how to encourage a loved one toward treatment. Studies have found it gets more people into treatment than confrontational interventions. Our guide on how to help a loved one with addiction explains how it works.
- Grief support. If you’ve lost someone to substance use, groups such as GRASP (Grief Recovery After a Substance Passing) offer peer support for bereaved families.
Do rehab programs include the family?
Many do. Family programs can include education sessions, family therapy and family weekends. Research shows that involving family can improve treatment results, especially for teens and young adults. When you compare programs, ask:
- Is there a family program, and what does it cost?
- Can family members join therapy sessions, in person or by video?
- Will you be given information about aftercare and how to support recovery at home?
Our guide on how to choose a rehab lists more questions to ask.
Is Al-Anon right for me?
Al-Anon may help if you find yourself checking how much someone drank, making excuses for them, feeling anxious or angry most of the time, or putting your own needs last. You don’t have to be sure the person is an alcoholic. If you’re trying to decide, our guide “Is my husband an alcoholic?” covers the warning signs, and our AUDIT quiz has a “Someone I love” mode.
When your loved one is ready for treatment
If your loved one is ready to try meetings, our AA and NA meeting pages list local meetings by city.
Support groups help you. Treatment helps them. When your loved one is ready, you can search our directory of alcohol rehab and drug rehab centers by state, or call (833) 589-6933 to talk with our admissions helpline about programs and insurance.
Frequently asked questions
What is Al-Anon?
Al-Anon is a free, worldwide support group for people affected by someone else's drinking, such as spouses, parents, children and friends. Meetings focus on your own well-being, not on getting the drinker to stop.
Is Al-Anon the same as AA?
No. AA is for people who want to stop drinking. Al-Anon is a separate fellowship for their families and friends. Both use the Twelve Steps.
Is there a support group for families of drug addicts?
Yes. Nar-Anon and Families Anonymous are Twelve Step groups for families of people who use drugs. SMART Recovery Family & Friends is a non-Twelve-Step option. Many Al-Anon members also have loved ones who use drugs as well as alcohol.
Are Al-Anon meetings online?
Yes. Al-Anon offers phone and online meetings as well as in-person groups. You can find them at al-anon.org or in the Al-Anon Family Groups app.
Do I have to talk at an Al-Anon meeting?
No. You can simply listen. Newcomers are welcome to say "I pass" or to introduce themselves by first name only.
